Healer of Rohan
by Meluivan Indil
Summary: Complete. Third story in the Blood Series. Three friends scattered to the wind, but then brought back together by fate, during one of the most dangerous times imaginable. Can their friendship withstand the changes brought on by time and old wounds not qui
1. Chapter 1: Decisions Made

**Summary: **Three friends scattered to the wind, but then brought back together by fate, during one of the most dangerous times imaginable. Can their friendship withstand the changes brought on by time and old wounds not quite healed? Will one of them go to far with their sense of duty, bringing about a final end to the friendship that should have withstood the test of time? Or will true friendship withstand all adversity?

**Disclaimer: **Nothing in the Tolkien universe belongs to me. I am making no money from this. There is only one character in this fic that belongs to me. That is Atavus. Please do not borrow her, unless you ask first.

_Author's Note: This story is the third in a series I am writing. If you do not read the first two you will probably be confused. The first story is **Blood For The Taking**, the second is **The Long Journey Home**. This fic is partially set in Rivendell, and then moves on to Rohan sixty-two years later. The Rohan portion occurs during The Two Towers. This story is based on book verse mainly, but there may be some parts that are closer to the movie verse, and I will do my best not to disturb any facts already set down by the master Tolkien. Please do not shoot me if I don't get it exactly right. _

_You may notice that the scenes skip most of the parts already set down by Tolkien. I am writing fill in scenes adding a character. If you've read the first two in my series you will know whom. I will try to make things as clear as possible without repeating history that we already know. If I have confused you I am sorry, I will try not to do so while telling the story. Heck I'm confused enough for all of us._

Sindarin Translations:

Gwador-nin: my brother– sworn brother, not of blood 

_Gwathel-nin: my sworn sister, not of blood_

**Decisions Made**

_Third age, year 2957, Rivendell_

Atavus had climbed the steps leading from the gardens and stood on the balcony outside Lord Elrond's study. It had been three years since Dol Guldur. During that time Estel had spent much of his time with the Rangers from the North, and royal duties had kept Legolas in Mirkwood for the most part. That left Atavus spending most of her time with the twins, which did not bother her, but still it was not the same as spending time with her closest friends. Atavus took a seat in one of the chairs on the balcony situated in a corner that was not easily seen by those in the garden or from within the study. She did not want to be disturbed that sunny afternoon. She just wanted to relax. The tranquil peace was disturbed though when she heard the door to Lord Elrond's study open. She thought maybe she should leave the balcony to give the Lord his privacy, but she was just too comfortable to move.

"We received a correspondence from Gondor today, Lord Elrond." She knew the voice. It was Lord Glorfindel. "Ecthelion has asked if we could send him a healer who has experience with Morgul poisoning, that could train his own healers. They have lost their chief healer, and he did not teach the other healers enough about the poison. They are losing many soldiers do to the foul poison."

"Hmmm. The fighting in Gondor is becoming so much worse. I of course will send aid. I just do not enjoy asking any of our healers to make that long and dangerous journey. There are many that will go if I ask, but I know none of them will truly want to." Elrond sighed, wondering which of his people would accept. "They all have families. No matter who I send if something were to happen they would leave many grieving ones behind." He himself would grieve for anyone he sent.

"It's too bad…" Glorfindel began to say something, but thought better of it.

"What my friend?" Elrond asked knowing it was unlike his longtime friend to hold back his opinion.

"I'm sorry. I was about to say something very foolish." Glorfindel answered shaking his head.

"No, you had an idea." Elrond urged.

"I was about to say it was too bad Atavus wasn't healing Morgul poisoning anymore, since she had no family, but then I remembered that she very much does have a family." Glorfindel was the only elf outside of her friends and family that knew her secret. And she had always felt as if he was an adopted uncle of sorts. He had never judged her because of what she was.

But she felt a cold chill when she heard Glorfindel say she had no family. No she had no blood family in Rivendell, that was true, but she had thought she had been accepted by Lord Elrond's family as one of there own. She knew he meant no harm by his words, but still the pain of knowing you really didn't fit in was still acute in her.

"Yes if anything were to happen to her there are many here that would grieve just as much as if one of their own blood had gone to the Halls, including my sons and I." Elrond corrected his friend.

"I know that. I was not thinking before I spoke, it's just with her special gifts; she would be perfect for the task. Even if she was wounded she would heal, much faster than any elf you could send." Glorfindel was being realistic, and Elrond understood that, but still he was not so quick to let go of one he thought of as a daughter.

"But you forget my friend, I have been running blood tests on her for the last few years. Her blood is not the same anymore. Since she has spent all this time among the elves, and has not faced the fire of combat in that time, her orc blood has receded. She is more elf than orc now. Her gifts don't even work anymore. She couldn't heal Morgul poisoning if she wanted." Elrond pointed out.

She had consciously made an effort to control her blood production, and had managed in the last three years to become more elflike than she had ever been. She knew if she wanted she could turn the process the other way, but not while she was still in Rivendell. Being around the elves and their tranquil ways had tamed her blood. But she had never planned to leave the elves, so it hadn't mattered as much to her to lose her gifts.

But there was always that nagging feeling in the back of her mind that she was not doing what she was meant to do. The Ilúvatar had created her the way she was for a reason, she knew that, but she had not yet decided exactly why. She somehow knew though that she was not living up to her destiny where she was, but she had never wanted anything more than to be accepted and cared for by the elves. She had received exactly what she wanted, but was it fair to accept what she was given, but not give anything back? She silently left the balcony, leaving the two Lords to continue their talk. She herself had a lot to think of.

* * *

Almost everyday for a week she sat on a stone bench in the garden staring off in the distance. The members of Lord Elrond's house knew she sometimes needed time to herself to think, but the Lord himself had seen that look on her face before. She was searching for an answer that her mind did not know how to give her. It seemed almost as if she was waiting for something.

That something arrived early the next morning. She was again in the garden when she heard familiar footsteps behind her. She whirled around the smile spreading across her face. "Estel, you are home." She rushed him embracing him in a large hug.

"Did you miss me, _mellon-nin_?" He laughed swinging her around in the air.

"More than you know." She said pulling back and looking at him. She could see that his experience with the Rangers was making him more of the man he was to become one day. He looked but a little older than when she first met him. But in the six years she had known him he had become much wiser. "How long do you stay?" She asked hoping it would be longer than his usual week.

"I am not sure." He answered. This was not a normal answer for him. She looked quizzically at him. She could tell there was something he hid from her. But she was so glad to have him back that she did not question further.

* * *

She came across him sitting on a stone bench, in an atrium of sorts. The bench was positioned close to a statue. The statue held the broken shards of Narsil, and before it was a mural depicting the fall of Sauron at the hands of Isildur. She already knew Estel's secret, that he was the heir of Isildur. He had brought her there once two years before, and told her of his heritage, that he did not want. At the time she had not understood his unwillingness to accept his destiny. But in the last few days she very much understood. She had decided before he ever came home that she was not fulfilling her own destiny staying in Rivendell, and must one day leave, but still she lingered. She did not want to leave.

She could see that he was deep in thought, and the frown on his face said that he did not enjoy the thoughts.

"What upsets you so my friend?" She asked sitting beside him.

He knew she had entered. Like the elves she made almost no sound, but his senses had always been more acute.

"I have made a decision, that I don't necessarily like." He answered not looking at her.

"What kind of decision, Estel?" She knew this was what had been bothering him ever since coming home.

"I leave tomorrow." He answered.

For some reason she sensed that he wasn't talking about going out with the Rangers any more. "Where do you go?"

"There is much of this land I have seen little of, and there is much I must learn about my kind." He said looking at his hands.

"You mean humans." It was a statement, not a question.

"Yes." He finally looked at her. He had expected to have an argument with her, but instead he could see understanding and acceptance there. "I go to Rohan first."

She had known this day was coming. No matter how hard he tried to fight it his destiny called him ever stronger as the days went by. "I will miss you, _Gwador-nin._"

"And I you, _Gwathel-nin._" He answered taking her hand. "Thank you, for understanding."

"Yes I understand." She said, but did not tell him of her own decision to leave. He was going to Rohan, not Gondor, and if he knew she was leaving he would insist upon going with her. She understood all too well that to become the human he had to be he would have to travel his road alone.

This is what she had been waiting for. Somehow she knew something was going to occur that would change her very life. She just had to wait a short while for it to happen. The absence of Estel in Rivendell would make it easier to leave. It never was quite the same when he was not there. And now she knew he would be gone for many long years.

* * *

Atavus knocked on the study door, and waited to hear the familiar voice ask her in. She heard nothing. It was quite late at night. She wondered if maybe Lord Elrond had already retired for the evening. She decided to peek inside just in case he had fallen asleep at his desk again. There had been many a night that she had found him fast asleep where he had been working.

She crept slowly into the room, which was lit by many candles, and yes he was asleep at the desk. He always worked too long and too hard, and when he did sleep it was the deep sleep of exhaustion. She made her way silently to the desk and was about to wake him to send him off to his own bed, but something on his desk caught her eye. It was a letter addressed to the Steward of Gondor. She knew she shouldn't read it. But she found her eyes scanning the contents anyway. It was an introduction letter for the elf that he meant to send to help their healers. The name of the elf had not been filled in yet. She wondered if he still wasn't sure whom to send.

She wondered if she should dare to do what had entered her mind. She had meant to approach the Lord and ask for his permission to be sent, but with the letter right before her, if she dared she could leave without anyone even knowing. She took the quill he had been righting with, and with shaky fingers tried to copy his flowing script. She filled her own name in the blank that he had left, and then picked up his signet ring which would be used to seal the letter. She folded the letter as quietly as possible then added a dab of wax from a candle and sealed it herself. It was ready. All she had to do was make her way out of Rivendell now. She looked at the sleeping form of the man she considered to be her father, and decided she could not leave him without any clue of her whereabouts.

She took a piece of parchment and began to write.

_Dear Ada,_

_I'm sorry to be leaving like this without a word of goodbye to those I love, but I knew you would not want me to go if I told you. I have gone to Gondor to help the healers there. Don't worry my healing ability will be back before I even reach the White City. I have learned much thanks to you about how to control my gift. For this I thank you. Tell the twins that I love them and some day I will return to cause trouble with them again, but for now I have a purpose to fulfill. The Ilúvatar created me the way I was for a reason. I know this, and I have been selfishly ignoring that fact for many years now. It is time I do what I was meant to do all along._

_If you see Estel before I see you again tell him that I understand why he had to leave, because I had to leave for a very similar reason. He has a grand destiny to fulfill, and though mine may not be so grand it is my own destiny, and I can't forsake it forever._

_And Legolas, he will not understand this, but there is no way I can stop what is to come. Tell him that I wish I could have seen him before I left, but I think it would just be harder on us both. And please I know it is wrong, but don't tell him where I went. He will only try to follow me. He can't do that. I must face my duty alone, and he has his own duties to attend to in Mirkwood._

_You have been better to me than any father I could have ever asked for, and for that I will always be grateful. I will miss you. _

_Atavus_

She replaced the letter she had taken with her own and crept silently out of the room again. Her things were ready. As she left the Last Homely House she felt a great sadness on her soul, knowing it might be many years before she saw it again.

_

* * *

Author's note: I know, I know. I have not forgotten Legolas, before anyone asks, it's just that in the last three years he has visited rarely because of his own royal duties, so she is not considering him in her decision to leave. Which as we all know may cause trouble in the future._


	2. Chapter 2: But Why?

**Disclaimer: **See chapter 1.

**Review Responses: **

_Karone Evertree_: Yes Legolas is definitely in this chapter. As a matter of fact it is all Legolas.

_manveri mirkiel_: Yes Aragorn definitely has the big brother thing down. And being a human he grows older faster, and that makes him even more so. And poor Legolas has got a shocker in store.

**Sindarin terms**:

_Mae govannen: Well met_

**But Why?**

It had been almost a year since Legolas had visited Rivendell. Estel had visited Mirkwood and said his goodbyes a few weeks earlier, but they had both been worried for their friend left behind in Rivendell. Though she had accepted Estel's decision, he had not been sure that she would not grow despondent during his absence. Legolas had wanted her to know that she would not be alone during her adoptive brother's absence. He had vowed to make more time for trips to Rivendell.

He entered the courtyard of the Last Homely House expecting to be met by his friend, or at least by the twins, but was surprised to find the only one waiting for him was the Lord himself.

"_Mae govannen, _Lord Elrond." Legolas said touching his chest in the elvish form of greeting, after dismounting.

"_Mae govannen,_ Prince Legolas." Elrond also gave the formal greeting. Legolas saw the distressed look in the Lord's face.

"Has something happened my Lord?" He asked with a look of concern crossing his face. "Where is Atavus?"

"I'm afraid she has gone." Elrond answered.

"Gone where?" Legolas answered in shock.

"I'm afraid I can not say. Come to my study. We must speak." Elrond said turning back to the door.

"Has she followed after Estel?" Legolas asked worried that maybe she hadn't accepted his leaving as easily as Estel thought.

"No. I don't believe she wanted either you or Estel to know she was going. She waited a few days after he left to go. She stole away in the night with only a letter to me so that I would not worry. In the letter she said that she had a destiny to fulfill, that wasn't quite so grand as Estel's, but she could no longer forsake it." Elrond explained.

"What destiny is she speaking of?" Legolas did not understand this at all.

"She believes that the Ilúvatar created her the way she was for a reason. She was meant to be a healer. Here she had very little chance to do what she feels she was meant to do." Elrond tried to explain. He understood why she left, but he only wished she had not left in the way she had.

"I can not believe she left like that." Legolas spoke what was in both their minds.

"She said to tell you that she wished she could have seen you before she left, but that would have been harder for the both of you. She does not want you to follow her. She said that you each have separate duties to perform, you in Mirkwood, and her elsewhere." Elrond knew the words would not ease the young elf's pain.

"Will you excuse me Lord Elrond? I need time to myself. I think I will retire to my room." Legolas asked standing. Lord Elrond could hear the pain in his voice.

"Yes of course. Rivendell is as much your home as any other. You may stay and rest as long as you need." He watched as the elf that he had accepted long ago as just another member of his extended family left the room. He could see the slump of the elf's shoulders, and knew that the news he had just given would deeply affect his spirit.

Instead of going to his own room Legolas first ventured into the room across the hall that Atavus had occupied. The room was neatly kept, and he noticed more the things that were missing, instead of what was there. Her weapons, which always stood polished and ready in the corner, were gone. He then looked into the wardrobe and noticed that her comfortable leggings and tunics were missing, but she had left the beautiful gowns that Elrond had, had made for her. Where ever she was going she planned on being comfortable while there, and traveling light to get there. He sat on the bed staring into the wardrobe, and taking in the rest of the room. Nothing else seemed out of place to him. But the room felt empty without her there. He didn't like the feeling.

He moved on to the room right next to his. It was Estel's room. He knew what to expect when he entered there. The room was filled with all of the many odd things that the Ranger had collected over the years that he had been in the wilds. Unlike Atavus' room though neat and tidy it was filled with all kinds of objects, some of which Legolas did not even know the origin. Rocks of many shapes and hues, seeds to be planted that he did not recognize, and many plants that would come in handy for making the healing potions that his Ada had taught him to make. It looked ready to be occupied at any moment, but Legolas knew it would not see it's occupant for many years to come.

He moved on to his own room feeling overwhelmingly tired at the moment. He had rode hard to get to Rivendell. But he knew his weariness, had more to do with the missing friends than with any amount of exertion on his part. As he entered his own room he noticed how much it resembled Atavus' own, almost bare except for a few cloths in the wardrobe, and a few books tossed on the desk. That caused a thought that was not very pleasant. Did she feel as if she was just a sometimes guest in her home in Rivendell, just as he was? Surely not. Elrond and the twins had always made her feel as if she was part of their family also.

But then he noticed something on his nightstand that he had not left there on his last visit. He approached the stand and picked up the book lying on top of it. It was a very old, very well worn copy of a book that described the traits, and history of the Valar. He opened the book to a page that the corner had been turned down as a mark. A piece of paper fell out to the floor. He bent to pick the paper up as he stared at the marked page. It was the description of Estë. Legolas remembered comparing Atavus to Estë once. It had embarrassed her to be compared to one of the Valar, he remembered.

He took a seat on the bed and first read what was on the page of the book.

_Estë is widely known as Estë the gentle. She is often seen clad in grey and gives the gifts of sleep, rest and healing. She walks at night under the starlit heavens in gardens filled with night flowers such as red poppies and with trees like pine and cypress. She can hear the songs of sleepy Nightingales and walks paths lit by Glowworms. By day she sleeps on the Isle in the midst of Lake Lorellin. Upon this island are her fountains, lulling her to sleep._

Legolas had compared Atavus to Estë because of her healing abilities, and the fact that she loved the nighttime hours more than the day. Many nights he would find her walking through the gardens of Rivendell, listening to the sounds of the night.

He then opened the piece of paper, and found that it was a letter addressed to him.

_Legolas,_

_I am sorry mellon-nin for leaving without seeing you, but I knew you would fear too much for me, and do everything in your power to either keep me here or follow me where I must go. But you cannot follow me. You have your life, and your duties back in Mirkwood. And I have my own destiny to follow._

_You once compared me to Estë, and though it both flattered and embarrassed me, it also made me think. If the Ilúvatar and the Valar with the Great Song created all beings great and small, then just maybe you are right. If I was created by any of the Valar it would have to be Estë, and there would have to be a reason. I cannot stay hidden away in Rivendell, forsaking the gifts that I have been given. They were meant to be put to use, and I must do just that._

_I will not tell you where I have gone. But I promise you I will be careful. Please don't be angry with me. I only do what my heart says I must. _

_Remember one thing though. I never started really living until I met you and Estel. You two are my light. The whole reason why life has been worth living for me these last few years. I will always hold you in my heart. And if the Valar are willing I will see you both again someday. That is the hope I hold dear to._

_Please hold that hope also,_

Atavus 

Legolas carefully folded the letter and placed it back in the book. He then relaxed on the bed lying on his side holding the book close to his chest. As he fell into his waking dreams they were of three friends sitting together around a campfire laughing at many stories and jokes. All three friends had smiles on their faces, and they were the happiest times he could remember.

_

* * *

Author's Note: Well there is your Legolas fix, for now. And I wish to thank the members of the Council of Elrond website for the wonderful description of Estë. Next chapter jumps into the thick of things, and also jumps ahead many years. So be prepared._


	3. Chapter 3: Prisoner of Rohan

**Disclaimer: **See chapter 1.

**Review Responses: **

_Karone Evertree_: Honestly if you can believe it he did exactly what she wanted him to, no matter how much he hated it. He went home. He continued his life. He did his duty, just as he was expected to do. Doesn't that just bite?

_Larien_: Oh wow I love new reviewers. Yes I have to admit I have a soft spot for Lord Elrond. I like to portray him as the loving father figure.

_Slayer3_: ah please quit crying. Here have a tissue.

**Author's Note: **I'm afraid I must change my mind about something that may not sit well with the true Tolkien enthusiasts. I know I said this fic would be based on book verse, but after going back and rereading certain parts of the book, I have found that the storyline in my mind just won't fit in the timeline of the book, so instead of changing things around in the book I will instead use the movie verse, which leaves a little more leeway with time. I do apologize if this disappoints any of my readers.

**Prisoner of Rohan**

_Third age, Year 3019 March, Edoras, 62 years later._

Four members of the Fellowship have come to Edoras, to free it's King of his horrible possession by the foul Wizard Saruman. After being freed King Théoden learns of the death of his son Théodred. It is evening, and Gandalf the White sits as council to the King, in the great hall of Meduseld. Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli, and Éowyn are present.

"Then what is the decision of the King?" Gandalf asks after failing to convince the King that he must face Saruman in open combat.

King Theoden turns to him, and gives an answer that he will accept no argument to. "We will travel to Helm's Deep on the morrow." He resumed his seat on his throne and ignored the questioning glances he received from the members of the fellowship.

At that moment Háma the Captain of the Guard of Rohan entered the room. "Ah Háma, good I needed to see you. Tomorrow morning you are to instruct our people that we are to travel to the refuge of Helm's Deep, and they are only to take necessities." Théoden instructed.

"Yes Sire. But I have come with disturbing news." Háma answered.

"What now? Have we not gone through enough?" Théoden asked with a grimace on his face.

"After the funeral service you asked me to find your Chief Healer. She has been found." The guard said with an unpleasant look on his face.

"Where is she, and why did she not try to save my son?" Théoden's anger flowered at the one person he knew could have done something for his son, but was nowhere to be found.

"Sire, she is in the deepest darkest cell in your dungeon, and it looks as if she has been there for some time. The guards posted at her cell were loyal to Grima. They say he kept the key. Sire, by my reckoning she has been down there at least nine months. No one has seen her in that amount of time." Háma answered.

The blood drained from the King's face at his captain's words. "Come we must free her. Aragorn if I remember right from when you served under my father as Thoringil, you are a healer. Will you come help me? You may be needed."

"Of course your Highness." Aragorn stood to follow the King of Rohan. Legolas and Gimli also followed. Gandalf remained in the King's Hall.

They traveled down a long staircase into the very rock and stone, until they reached the bottom most level of the King's home. There they made their way to the farthest cell. "We have not used these cells in a very long time. It is no wonder no one knew Grima held her down here." The King explained as they turned the last turn coming upon a cell with iron bars covering the face of the cell. There was very little light. They could see two guards being held at sword point in front of the cell.

"What instruction's were you given by that foul Wormtongue?" He questioned them.

"Just to keep her in the cell, and keep her quiet, your Highness." One of the guards said in fear of the restored King.

"And how have you kept her quiet?" He asked. The guards looked down, not answering.

"How long has it been since she had food or water?" He asked another question.

"Days, my lord." One of them answered.

"Lock them in cells on the higher levels. I will decide what to do with them later." He instructed one of the guards who were holding them at sword point.

Théoden turned to the cell. He could barely see a form crouched in the corner, with her back to them. "Bring me a torch Háma." The captain did as he said and brought his King a torch. Shocked gasps were heard in the cramped hall, as the torchlight exposed the bare flesh of her back covered in dried blood. She had been brutally lashed they could see. She was sitting in the corner, facing the wall with her knees pulled up to her chest, and her face resting on the knees.

"Ata. It is your King. Don't despair; we will get you out of there. Someone find that key." He ordered the anger showing in his voice. She made no move to answer him. She made no move at all.

The three members of the Fellowship had stood quietly as the King questioned the guard, but Legolas pressed his face closer to the iron bars, peering at the form before him. Something was familiar. She was filthy with the dirt and muck of the cell, and he could see very little of her, but still he felt something pull at his memories. "Your Highness, what did you call her?"

Théoden looked at the elf in confusion. "Her name is Ata. But what difference does that make? We must free her."

Aragorn looked to his friend and saw a light flash through his eyes, and then a disturbing look cross his face. "What is it Legolas? Do you know her?"

"Aragorn I don't know how I am sure, but I do know her, and so do you." Legolas answered.

Aragorn looked back to the woman, but his memory was not as good as the elf's. "I'm sorry Legolas. Who?"

He looked again to the figure in the corner, and was positive this time. It was more a feeling than anything he could see. "Aragorn, that is Atavus."

He knew that name. As a flood of memories came rushing back the blood drained from Aragorn's face, and he turned to the woman in front of him. Her hair had been cut to shoulder length, making it curlier, but it was that same fiery red color he remembered, and now that he was paying more attention, he could see that her build was the same. And even the dried blood on her back was darker in color than it should have been. Instead of the rusty color of a normal beings blood it was almost black.

"Atavus." He called out to her. He could see the tremble in her shoulders, as she attempted to pull her head up. She turned her ear to him to hear the voice better. He could see the point on the tip. "Atavus, it is you, isn't it?"

"Estel." She whispered shakily.

"Yes it is I. And Legolas is here too." He answered her, gripping the bars in front of them wanting to rip them from the very foundation.

"Legolas." She said in a voice that seemed too distant.

"Yes, mellon-nin." His voice was full of emotion that surprised all in the room except Aragorn.

Gimli had been watching his friends, but had also been inspecting the cell door that kept the woman imprisoned. "Stand back. I can remove that door." He said pushing forward and using his axe blade to remove the pins in the hinges of the door. Then he and two of the guards lifted up on the Iron door pulling it free of its hinges, and busting the lock. The door fell to the floor making a loud crashing noise.

Aragorn and Legolas were the first to enter the cell. They each kneeled beside their crouching friend who had started rocking back and forth. "You're not real. I know you're not real." She whispered as Legolas removed his cloak and wrapped it around her torso.

"We are very real Atavus. Can you not see that?" Aragorn asked, tilting her head up to look in her eyes. He saw both fear and confusion there. He had seen pain and despair color her face in times gone by, but the look he saw then was worse than any he could imagine.

"It has been sixty-two years Estel. I had given up on ever seeing you again. How can you be here?" She asked tears flowing down her cheeks.

"Does it matter how? We just are." He said taking her in his arms. She was in shock, and probably thought she was going insane. He wanted so much to assure her that she was still sane. She clung to him, and for the first time in months let her muscles relax. She could see Legolas near them over Aragorn's shoulder. He had unshed tears in his eyes. She reached out one hand taking his, in her own. Aragorn let go of her so Legolas could take her in his arms also.

It seemed to her as if he would never let go once he held her, and at the moment she didn't want to. He felt very real to her. More real than anything had been in months.

She looked around her noticing that many others were watching the reunion, including her King. She pulled away from Legolas standing unsteadily, pulling the cloak more tightly around her body, and bowed. "Sire, I'm sorry for my absence." She started.

"None of that Ata. I'm sorry I failed you, and did not realize that Grima had imprisoned you. Things have changed now. I am free of the spell I was under, and am back in control of Rohan. Come now, let's get you out of here, and back to your own chambers, where you can be properly cared for." He said turning and leading them back to the higher levels of Meduseld.

Aragorn and Legolas each took a position on either side of Atavus, wanting to protect her. Gimli followed behind, sensing that his two friends needed time alone with the woman they were protecting.

_

* * *

Author's Note: Okay I know 62 years is a long time, but I promise in future chapters you'll see how she got where she is, and so forth and so on. Please don't throw anything at me for not having Legolas go after her._


	4. Chapter 4: Changes

**Disclaimer:** See chapter 1

**Review Responses**:

_Slayer3_: Oh wow I love ice cream. So does Atavus. I'm touched; you remembered to get me the sugar free one.

_Karone Evertree_: Hmmm. Is she becoming an orc again? That's a good question. What should I say? Yes and No. You just have to read on. It's complicated.

Yes Legolas does have a soft side, and to his horror the dwarf got to see it. (Hey don't hug Legolas too hard. I need him for later.)

I did a little research and _ata_ means _again_ in Quenya. _Atar_ means _father_. I should have already known that, but since I prefer Sindarin to Quenya I didn't. Anyhow Atavus just shortened her name when she left Rivendell to draw less attention.

_Larien:_ Oh wow you like beating Aragorn. You could come in handy. I'll keep that in mind.

_DarkAngelOfDreams: _Aw shucks. Thank you.

**Author's Note: **To my evil short twin, who thinks way too much like me (you know who you are.), where are you? I gotta know what you think of the next two chapters. I think you're gonna hate 'em, but then again you're also gonna love 'em. You already know I'm twisted so don't look so shocked.

**Changes**

When they again entered the King's Hall Gandalf had an inquisitive look on his face to see the protective stance of the two warriors he had known so long, and was even more surprised to see what looked like a female elf walking between them.

"Éowyn, can you please accompany our guests to Ata's room, so she may be properly cared for." The King asked of his niece. "And arrange for food and water to be brought to her."

"Yes uncle." She said motioning them to a hallway that led to the sleeping quarters.

Gandalf followed them curious as to the identity of the woman.

After entering her quarters, Atavus sat on the bed not making a sound looking down at the floor. They could see she was still partially in shock.

Éowyn moved to the adjoining room and prepared a bath for her.

The four members of the Fellowship stood quietly waiting for her to say something. "You don't have to stay Estel. My wounds are a couple of days old. They are already healed. I just need a bath." She said quietly still not looking up.

Gimli and Gandalf exchanged a strange look, at both her using Aragorn's elvish name and the fact that her wounds would already be healed. The words struck a cord of recognition in Gandalf though. Lord Elrond had once mentioned something about a girl who had speeded healing abilities, but the memory escaped him.

"It's not the wounds on your body that concern me Atavus. It's the look in your eyes that does." Aragorn answered.

She looked up and looked around the room at the various people. She knew Éowyn, but was not exactly great friends with her, and she did not know the dwarf or the old man. She felt uncomfortable speaking in front of them. "Estel can this discussion wait until after I bathe, and maybe when it is more private?" She asked.

Aragorn noticed for the first time that he and Legolas were not the only ones there with her. "I'm sorry. Atavus these are our friends. Gimli son of Gloin, and Gandalf the White, also known as Mithrandir." Her eyes widened in awe as she remembered the name that she had heard so often while in Rivendell.

"My apologies, Mithrandir. If I had known I would have shown proper respect." She began to stand, but he waved her back down.

"Well child it seems you know who I am, but I do not know who you are, even though some of my companions do." Gandalf said smiling at her.

Éowyn left then wanting to give them more privacy, and to get the food her uncle had ordered brought up to the woman.

"Gandalf, I'm afraid you do know of her. Ada sent you word concerning her after she first arrived at Rivendell. But you never had the opportunity to meet her though." Aragorn explained somewhat.

Gandalf's eyes narrowed in a look of concentration, knowing he should know of what they spoke, but dying and being reborn again had pushed many non pertinent memories to the back of his mind, and it was hard to recall them now.

"Mithrandir, would the name Throwback, help to jog your memory some?" She asked again looking to the floor in shame.

It was as if a light shone in his mind. He did remember receiving word from Elrond, and then talking at length about the woman after she had left Rivendell. "Lord Elrond was very disappointed at the way you decided to leave his home child."

She looked at him surprised that, that was all he would say at being informed that he was in the room with a half-elf/ half-orc being. "It was not my intention to disappoint him." She answered.

"Well I know you have a lot to discuss with your friends. Gimli, come with me." Gandalf said turning and leaving the room. Gimli followed still very confused. She could hear Gandalf promising to explain to the dwarf, if he would only be quiet for a moment.

She then stood and went to the adjoining room She knew her friends had many questions to ask her, but she felt beyond filthy, and refused to say anything more until she was done bathing. She could hear murmured words coming from her friends, but shut them out, as she sunk into the warm water.

When she returned she was wearing one of her own thick nightgowns, and looked decidedly clean. She saw that food had been brought and was laid out on the table next to her bed. She sat on the bed crossing her legs in front of her. She looked at the food beside her, but did not feel hungry enough to eat it.

"You must eat." Legolas said leaning forward in the chair he had occupied beside the bed. He had felt how thin she had become when he held her in the dungeons below.

She took one piece of bread from the tray and started to nibble. She wasn't sure how long she had been in the dungeons, but she did know that she was not given food often, and her stomach did not relish the idea of being put to use again.

"You are going by your proper name now Estel?" She asked.

"Yes, the time of the final conflict with Sauron is almost upon us. The time for secrecy is over. I am now Aragorn, son of Arathorn, and heir to the throne of Gondor.

"So you have finally accepted your destiny. That is good." She said thoughtfully taking another bite of the bread.

"And what of your destiny, Atavus?" Legolas asked with a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

She turned to him, and saw many emotions present on his face. She saw concern for her well-being, but she also saw anger. She didn't know how to answer him.

"Come now, in the letter you left me, you said you had a destiny to follow. Is this your destiny? To be used and abused by humans. If that's the case then you well as stayed a slave in Mordor." The bitterness of his words cut like a knife. He stood from the chair and stalked over to the window.

"Legolas. No." Aragorn said trying to calm his friend.

"No Estel. Let him speak. I have this coming. I should have never left the way I did. He has held his bitterness in too long." She said with a defeated look on her face.

"Didn't you suffer enough abuse at the hands of the orcs, without having to come here and have it repeated by humans?" He asked turning to face her crossing his arms before him.

"A long time has gone by since I last saw you Legolas. You have just seen the bad parts of Rohan. I have been here for thirty-nine years. I have seen both the bad and the good. Up until five years ago when the King's mind began to be taken, this land and these people were very different. They became my people, and I have served them and their King well." She said in defense of the people she had grown to love.

"You came here shortly after I left for Gondor then?" Aragorn asked.

"Actually I was in Gondor when you first got there. I knew you were going by a different name, but I had seen you one day. I had meant to stay and try to contact you, but one of the men from Rohan that had traveled with you to Gondor told me of the news that Galen was ill. Though he had been a slave trader once, and had been my owner, I still considered him to be a friend. I rode back here with the men of Rohan that you knew and stayed here until Galen died. Afterwards I was asked by King Théoden to become his chief healer." She tried to explain part of the long years that had passed.

"You could have come back to Gondor." Estel said wishing she had done just that.

"I wanted to, but Galen's wife had already passed and they left two half grown children, who knew nothing about the world, and Galen had asked me to take care of them for him. Up until a few months ago I was training his grandchildren to be healers as I had his children before them. They are a good family. They needed me." She answered.

She could see that her words had not pleased Legolas. "You were happy in Rivendell. Can you tell me that you were happier here?" He asked.

"No I can not. The happiest I have ever been was in Rivendell, with those I considered to be my family. With you and Estel. But we all must grow up, and accept our responsibilities. Estel has done so. Since you are here with him I'm assuming you have done so also, accepting the fact that your place is by his side helping him to achieve what is meant to be. What have I done? Do you know what I have done?" She asked anger consuming her words. Making them louder.

"What have you done?" He asked still in that bitter tone.

"I have saved the lives of eight hundred and forty three men, women, and children in both Gondor, and Rohan, and treated thousands more for non life threatening illness. I am a healer Legolas. You can not be a healer, where people are healthy and uninjured." She threw the words at him.

Her words shook him. She had accomplished a lot since he had seen her. "You have done much for others, but what about you? You have changed. I can see it in your eyes. Your heart is cold. You are not the same Atavus we used to know." He whispered.

Aragorn realized that that was exactly what he had seen in her eyes while they were still in the dungeon. She had changed. But he believed Legolas' words were too harsh. "Legolas she has seen and been through a lot. It takes time to overcome certain things." He tried to reason.

She looked down to her hands clasped in her lap. She heard Aragorn's words, and knew he was wrong. She had been becoming colder for a long time now. Before she even came to Rohan. And she knew why also. But she could not speak of that with them, yet.

She watched silently as Legolas left the room. She knew at one time she would have followed him, never wanting to leave an argument unresolved between them, but not now. She did not have the heart anymore to try to fix what was wrong.

"I'll talk to him." Aragorn assured her.

"If you wish." She said in a dry voice. She could see him flinch at the coldness of her words.

After he had left she wondered at her own behavior. When she had first saw them again in the dungeons she had been elated at having her friends back with her. But now the coldness that she hid behind was creeping into her soul again. She wondered at her own sanity. "Why must I push those I love away?" She whispered to herself.

"What my lady?" It was Éowyn. Atavus had not realized that the other woman had entered the room again.

"Nothing. Just wondering aloud. So Éowyn, what have I missed in my absence? How fairs Edoras? How are your brother and cousin?" She asked the questions that popped into her head.

"Things are not well Atavus." She answered. Atavus noticed for the first time, the gown of black that the other woman was wearing instead of her normal white.

"What has happened?" She dreaded the other woman's words.

"My brother has been banished by Grima, and Théodred is gone." Éowyn answered.

"Gone?" Atavus said shaking her head staring at the black dress.

"His funeral was earlier today." She answered lowering her face.


	5. Chapter 5: Mourning

**Disclaimer: **See chapter 1

**Review Responses**:

_Slayer3_: You keep me supplied with ice cream, and I'll write you a book.

_Karone Evertree_: That's okay. I know what life can be like. I tend to forget that not everybody can be a bored housewife who doesn't sleep, and spends most nights immersed in her favorite hobby. You know what's wild I have seen so many readers complain because no one updates fast enough, and I sit here and complain because my favorite reviewers don't review fast enough. Isn't that ironic?

_manveri mirkiel_:

Chapter 2: I promise I was not complaining, I just missed you. As I've said before your awesome reviews make this so much more fun to do.

Chapter 3: Aragorn is 87 years old at the time of Lotr. Being a descendent of Númenor, gives him long life. As a matter of fact he lives 210 years. I'm like your friend laiqualaurelote, a stickler for detail. I can't help myself.

Don't worry about Atavus, we all go through things in our lives that change us, but the strong always make it back to what they were meant to be.

Shoot I gave the tissue to Slayer two chapters ago. Let me see if I can find you some more.

Chapter 4: Oh my god. I can't believe this, you are my twin. The whole reason why I became interested in Lotr, was because of the friendship angle between Legolas and Aragorn. I kept thinking to myself, when I was younger, high school age, my friends and I would have died for each other. We were always there for each other. We fought for each other. We cried with each other. We were inseparable. Now there is not one of those friends that I even keep in contact with, and I have never met friends like that since. We all just drifted apart, and I miss that kind of friendship so much. So I wanted to create a friendship that no matter how many ups and downs there are, the friendship would always shine through in the end.

I'm sorry I made Legolas such a pain, but you have to realize something. Estel left to go be Thoringil for a few decades, and Atavus just up and disappeared. He felt deserted by his two best friends. It's not easy being the one left behind, and since Estel told him he was going but Atavus just slipped off in the night, well that decided which one he'd be mad at.

I meant chapter 4 and 5. If 4 got to you, 5 is gonna have you screaming. But guess what I have also got 6 for you, which I promise you will love. Yes I am going to post both chapters at once. I've been on a writing spree, and I have a feeling if I post just 5 I'm gonna have people out for my blood.

Oh and yes I remember, when it's time for Ugluk to go it's your job. That's still working through my head for now. I cannot figure why you hate my pet orc so much, but to each his own.

_Larien_: Since Atavus is sort of an elf she has a pretty good memory. Plus for her it's more than just like a doctor and a patient. She's got the faces of those she healed burned into her mind, just the same as the ones she couldn't save.

**Author's Note**: Sorry this chapter is so short, but I felt it needed to stand alone. As I told manveri I have both 5 and 6 ready to post, and to keep my pretty little neck in one piece I'll post them both now. So 6 will be up right after this.

**Mourning **

Aragorn watched Atavus walk from the halls of Meduseld, heading towards the burial mounds. She was dressed in black. It was early morning. So early that no one else was stirring yet. He had not slept. There was much to think about. One thing that kept returning to the forefront of his mind was the look he had seen in her eyes the night before. Her eyes seemed deader than they had been when he had first met her in Ithilien.

He followed her to the tomb they had buried the King's son in the day before. She was kneeling beside the tomb holding one of the simbelmynë flowers. She stared at the flower in her hand. He could see that her hands were trembling. He wondered if he should leave her to grieve on her own. But he could not leave her like that.

He kneeled besides her taking her hand in his own. "Talk to me Atavus." He said stroking her palm.

"It is funny that a white flower grows on these tombs. In the past sixty-two years I have spent more time in the color black than any other. The dead wear a gown of beautiful white flowers, when the living are draped in black."

"Were you close to Théodred?" He asked when he began to silently compare her to Gandalf and his riddles.

"I was training him to be a healer. He wanted to be both skilled with the sword, and with healing hands. That is rare in a King. He would have made a good one." She said, not telling her friend that she had watched the boy grow into a man, and she had felt a motherly instinct to the man that was still but a boy in her mind. Just another loved one who was here today, but gone tomorrow.

"I'm sorry Atavus." He paused for a moment staring into her eyes. "You can't continue on this way _mellon-nin_. Something is eating you from the inside out. It will destroy you soon."

She pulled her hand away from him. "Estel please don't. There is so much that you don't understand. I can't do this anymore."

"What can't you do anymore?" He asked confused.

"Be your friend. Have friends at all. It's too hard. I don't want it anymore. I don't want to care anymore." She stood meaning to turn and walk away.

He grasped her hand swinging her around. "You are blinded by your grief. That is not how you really feel." He said grasping on anything that would take the cold icy look from her eyes.

"Isn't it? You and Legolas have both seen it Aragorn. It has been coming on for many years now, not just recently. I don't care for you or Legolas anymore. I don't care for anyone anymore." She pulled from his grasp and ran towards the hall, leaving him bewildered behind her.

* * *

When Legolas found him later he had not come to terms with her words yet, and had not yet left the burial mounds. "Théoden looks for you." The elf said sitting on the ground next to him. He looked over and was surprised to see his friend's eyes were red as if he had been fighting back tears. "What is wrong, _mellon-nin_?"

"There are so many things that I should be worried about right now, but the only things in my mind are the hateful words of a friend." Aragorn answered. He could see the confused look in his friend's face. "Atavus was here earlier."

A frown crossed the elf's face. "What did she say?"

"She has no need for friends anymore. She wants none. She wants no one to care for her, and she wants to care for no one else." Aragorn answered.

Legolas was stunned. "What are we going to do about it?"

"Nothing. She meant it. Her heart is gone Legolas. It is dead. She has become what she hated the most after all. She does not look like an orc, but she is one inside." Aragorn said looking down.

"How did we let this happen Estel?" Legolas asked, placing a comforting hand on his friend's shoulder.

"I don't know if we could have stopped it or not, but I somehow feel like I let her down." Aragorn answered as the grief of a dead friendship threatened to take him.

_

* * *

Author's Note: Okay now I am going to go hide Atavus, so my reviewers don't try to hurt her. Sorry guys. I know she's not herself._


	6. Chapter 6: Cliffs and Mountains

**Disclaimer: **Never been, never will be.

**Cliffs and Mountains**

Legolas stood looking over the cliff face staring into the water below. The look of despair on his face showed only a tenth of the pain he felt, at the thought of loosing his dearest friend, his brother in the heart if not in blood.

He heard the voice of King Théoden beside him but it seemed as if it was from far away. "Leave the dead."

Legolas turned sharply at the words staring at the King. How could he consider leaving Aragorn behind? He swayed slightly thinking he might actually collapse. No! His mind shouted. He looked back to the swirling water below clasping the Evenstar tightly in his hand, not realizing it was cutting into the flesh of his palm. Théoden laid one hand on his shoulder. "Come." Was the only word he said before walking away.

* * *

Atavus had been asked to stay with Éowyn to get the women and children safely to Helm's Deep. She had not complained. Normally she would have jumped at the chance to do combat with the orcs and wargs, but at the time she just did not care. After arriving she realized there was a lot to be done. People were milling about aimlessly in all directions. They seemed as lost as she felt. She took directions from Éowyn until they heard calls from near the gate. "Make way for the King." She watched as the men rode in. When she saw the wounded she immediately came out of the daze she was in. She began ordering the other healers to take the wounded. She only half heard the conversation between the King and his niece, but paused as she saw Gimli walk up to Éowyn.

"Lord Aragorn?" The woman asked.

She heard the emotion in the dwarf's voice. "He fell."

Atavus stopped giving orders swallowing hard as she heard the two words. She turned looking around the courtyard. She could see the lithe figure of the Mirkwood elf disappear up a set of steps leading to the top parapets of the Keep. She looked around again at the wounded and the healers caring for them. She had a duty to perform, but it seemed as if she had forgotten everything she knew about healing. She left the courtyard following the path the elf had taken.

She was behind him by several yards, but kept following. The topmost parapet was in a half-moon shape with each end built into the rock wall of the mountain behind the keep. She saw as he quickly made his way to the mountainside and began to climb up the rock face. She followed without wavering. As she pulled herself up to the crest of the mountain she could see him sitting on a bare flat spot large enough to hold twenty men. He was looking off in the direction that they had ridden in from.

She walked over and sat a few feet away from him, not in front of him, but where he could see she was there. She also looked in the direction he did.

"Why did you follow me up here?" He asked not looking at her.

"I want to know what happened." She said turning to face him.

"Ask Gimli." He said picking up a pebble and throwing it over the edge of the mountain.

"I'm asking you." She said quietly.

"Go away and don't pretend to care now. It's too late now." He said bitterly. "I have lost my brother."

_I have lost my brother too_, she silently said to herself. _I have lost both of you_. "I deserved that, but I still believe I have the right to know." She said just as quietly as before.

"You want to know what happened. He fell off a cliff, and into a river. It swept him away." He threw another pebble as hard as he could.

"But there is a chance that he might still be alive." She said sighing deeply.

"Yes, but what do you care? Oh that's right you don't." He said sarcastically. "How could you do that to him? We spent years closer than any three people could be, and you just threw it away in a few moments time. Did we ever really mean that much to you?"

"You meant more to me than my own life Legolas. You ought to know that better than any other." She whispered.

"I thought I did. Do you know what Estel called you this morning? He called you an orc. He said that you had became what you hated the most." His words were said out of the deep painful emotions he felt for Aragorn. They were not meant to cause pain, but they struck their mark just the same.

She sucked in her breath, realizing that that must be exactly what she seemed like to them. The image of he foul orc brother flashed to the front of her mind. She saw his eyes, and realized that they contained the same dead look hers had held in recent times.

"I do care." She whispered.

"Why do you care?" He asked again this time with a defeated tone. He was tired of trying to decipher her. He wanted Estel there. Estel was better at understanding emotions. But that was not possible. Why couldn't she just leave him to his misery?

"I care because I have to believe that he will come back." She said staring at her hands. "Because I don't want the last words I ever said to him to be a lie." She looked up again, and he was shocked to see tears flowing from her eyes, and her eyes were filled with a million emotions he thought she was no longer capable of. He saw pain, despair, and guilt in their depths, and something else. She was completely lost. She was the same Atavus he had known back in Rivendell. The one who had hid her face because she was afraid he would reject her when her orc blood had taken her. "I lied when I said I didn't care anymore. I've been lying so much in the last few years that I have almost convinced myself. But the truth is I care too much. He can't be dead. It's killing me Legolas." She sobbed.

The pain and bitterness of sixty-two years were wiped away with those last four words, and the look in her eyes. Legolas immediately moved to her side pulling her close, as she cried. "I don't understand what is happening to you _mellon-nin_. But I will do anything possible to help you." He whispered in her ear. He needed her friendship as much as she needed his.

"It's too much for me. I've forgotten why I ever left Rivendell. The grief, the pain and suffering, and all the death are too much. I feel as if I'm adrift at sea, clinging to one wooden plank in the midst of a sea of emotion. I'm drowning. I keep trying to shut it out. I was able to do that in the dungeons of Meduseld, but now I've been thrown right back in, and it's too much. I almost wish I were still locked in that cell. It would be easier." She tried to explain.

"Atavus you have been healing, and burying people non-stop for sixty-two years now. Other healers go through this too. I have seen it. You have tried to do too much. It's threatening your sanity. The only way you can stop this is to take a break. I'm not saying this just because I want you safe, but because it's true. You need to go home. Lord Elrond can help you through this." He cupped her chin and pulled her face up so he could look into her eyes. "Please. Promise me if we survive what will happen here, that you will go back to Rivendell."

At that moment she would have promised him anything. Even though her heart was broken at the thought of losing Estel she felt safe for the first time in a long time. But then her thoughts cleared. She tried to feel if her friend was out there somewhere. She could not feel him, but she was sure if he had died she would have known it. "I will make you that promise, if you promise me one thing."

"What do you wish?" He asked.

"Estel never gave up on me in Dol Guldur, and he never gave up on you in the Misty Mountain caves. I can't give up hope for him. Please promise me you won't give up on him either." She pleaded. "It's what he would want."

He looked into her eyes again, and saw the hope there. He remembered all the times they had faced the possibility of death. They had all survived one way or the other. "I will not give up hope. You are right. Estel would never forgive us if we gave up on him. We will stay here and wait for our friend. He will come." He said moving so they both could see in the direction that he expected Aragorn to come from. He took her hand in his. She could feel the Evenstar pressed between their palms. She grasped his hand as hard as he had grasped the pendent earlier. It cut into her hand as it had his, but she didn't care. Drops of both bright red, and dark red blood mingled together on the ground between them.

_

* * *

Author's Note: All right Atavus is pretty much back to semi-normal. (Yes well you would all be half cracked too, if you were part orc, part elf, and besides look at who her friends are. A stubborn elf, a reckless human, a slave collector, a blood- ale brewing dwarf, and twin prankster elves. ) So please don't hurt her. See she made up with the poor little elf._

_And yes before you say anything I do have a thing for blood. Don't ask if you don't want to know._


	7. Chapter 7: Forgiveness

**Disclaimer: **See Chapter 1.

**Review Responses:**

_Slayer3_: You think I'm joking huh. I'm really in the process of writing a novel. My own original work. I promise if I ever finish it, and it gets published (Yeah I got big dreams) I'll mail you a copy of it. It's hard not to love the elves isn't it?

_Karone Evertree_: Yeah I updated twice on the same day, but they were short chapters, and now I'm drawing a blank. So this one is going to take some time probably. I know what I want on the paper, but it just isn't cooperating by appearing there. And yes your review was very fast. Thank you. But if I don't hurry up and fill the blank spot below this review I'm going to be the one falling behind.

**Author's Note: **Okay I have to admit this update is a little late, compared to what I usually have going. But I do have a scapegoat. It's all my husbands fault. He bought me the second season of a TV show I used to love, and since it was a western now my head is muddied up with gunfights instead of swords and bows. So if you blame anyone, blame him. (Dang I wonder if anyone bought that?)

**Sindarin Translations:**

_Le abdollen_ – You're late

_Hannon le_ – Thank you

**Forgiveness**

As Aragorn entered the Keep of Helm's Deep his only thought was to tell King Théoden of the large host that was marching towards them. He was greeted by Gimli first. He was happy to see his friend and would have liked to prolong their meeting, but his first responsibility was to give warning, so he rushed off towards the king's hall. He was almost there when a figure appeared before him. He looked up into the startling blue eyes of his best friend.

"_Le abdollen_." Legolas said.

This brought a wry smile to Aragorn's lips.

"You look terrible." Were his next words, as he looked the Ranger over, as concern crossed his face.

At that Aragorn did chuckle. He looked down as Legolas extended his hand. He reached out and took the Evenstar pendant from his friend.

"_Hannon le_." He said. He looked up to his friend who he knew, even though it did not show, must have suffered not knowing his fate.

Atavus had seen him enter the gates below.She and Legolas had made their way down the mountainside, but as they approached him she had hung back so Legolas could speak to him first. She still felt very guilty over her behavior of earlier. She stood in the shadows watching the exchange between her friends noticing his ragged appearance. She could also see that he had been urgently making his way to the king's hall, with a look of great worry on his face, before Legolas stopped him.

She did not leave the shadows as Aragorn walked by Legolas. Legolas started to follow Aragorn, but stopped when he saw her. "Why didn't you speak to him?"

"He has something very important to do now. I could see it in his eyes. I will talk to him later. You follow him though. Please come tell me the news he brings, when you can." She longed to follow Aragorn also, but knew that her presence might distract him from what he needed to do. She could not do that.

"Please don't wait too long to talk to him. I'm afraid things might go ill, and then he'll never know the truth." Legolas said leaving her standing there in the shadows.

She soon learned that things might very well go ill that night, as an army of ten thousand marched towards the keep. She had been ordered to again help Éowyn to get all the women and children in the caves. She was following her orders, but stopped as she saw Aragorn. He was sitting on the steps outside the keeps armory, speaking to a young boy. She could not hear what they spoke of.

After the boy had left Aragorn sat staring down at his own sword. He knew that Legolas was right they had little to no chance of winning this fight, but it was his duty to do his best to try to defend these people. He looked beyond his sword to see a pair of green leggings in front of him. His eyes traveled up the person before him. He was surprised to see Atavus standing there staring down at him.

"I see you made it safely here." He said with a cold note to his voice.

"Yes. I see you made it here also, whether I used the term safely or not would be another story." She answered, making a clucking noise with her tongue. "You really should have those wounds seen too."

"They've been cleaned. They'll heal soon enough." He answered her stubbornly.

"I thought stubbornness was Legolas' trait. Yours is supposed to be recklessness." She said kneeling beside him trying to pull the torn fabric of his coat back.

A grim smile crossed his face. "If I remember right you had me beat when it came to that trait. You proved it in the Misty Mountain caves."

"Ah yes. I seem to remember something about that." She said pulling some athelas out of a pouch she had fastened to her waist. She thought maybe if she could keep him talking he wouldn't stop her from trying to help him. "That's not my worst trait though." She didn't look at his face. She concentrated on bandaging the wound on his shoulder.

"Oh and what is?" He asked curious as to where she was going.

She swallowed hard trying to bring up the courage to say she was sorry. "Pushing those I care for the most away from me, when I should be holding them as close as possible." She whispered. Her hands had begun to tremble.

"I thought you didn't care for anything anymore?" His words were not spoken in anger, but in confusion.

"That's another of my bad traits. I sometimes lie when I don't want anyone to know what I'm feeling. This time though it might have lost me a friend, and a brother." She still did not look at him. She had moved to his other side and was bandaging another wound.

He placed his hand over hers and used the other to pull her face up so he could look into her eyes. Instead of the cold dead look he expected he saw tears brimming her emerald green eyes. Her eyes sparkled as she fought to keep the tears in. "When this night is through you and I need to have a talk about what is going on."

"I already had that talk with Legolas." She smiled remembering how she had felt when he had forgiven her, and pledged to help her through what she was dealing with.

"You have?" Aragorn was surprised Legolas hadn't mentioned anything to him.

"Yes. We waited on top of the mountain for you to come back. We had a long talk. If things go well tonight, I will be heading back to Rivendell soon. I need to go home. I know most of the elves are gone, but I need to see Ada." He could see that the mention of going home made her smile brighter, and her eyes sparkle.

"Ada will be pleased. And I think that is exactly what you need." He also smiled, knowing his friend had not really changed so much that he no longer recognized her.

"I promise Estel. I will not shut you out again. Almost losing you has changed my perspective on many things. Losing you would have almost destroyed me, but the thought of losing you while you thought I did not care was much worse. If I ever say something so stupid to you again please don't believe me." In all of her life she had only begged a very few times, being to proud to lower herself, but now she felt as if she was pleading for him to forgive her, and she knew she would do anything for that forgiveness.

"Its not very often that I have a friend tell me not to believe them. But I will keep that in mind. But Atavus I would prefer it if you just didn't lie to me." He said taking both her hands in his.

"I'll try. But you know I have been influenced by dwarfs." She said jokingly. Then remembered something. "By the way, how did you and Legolas ever manage to become friends with Gimli? You I can see, but Legolas."

"Friendship is a mysterious thing. Sometimes those that you would expect to be bitter enemies manage to become the best of friends. But that is a long story, which we will tell you someday, but now I need to go find some chain mail." He said standing and pulling her up with him.

She thought of his words. He was right. How else could she being what she was have ever became friends with them?

She agreed hugging him fiercely; she also had tasks to perform of her own, before the fighting began. She just hoped he would not discover what she was planning and try to stop her.

* * *

_Author's Note: Aren't you happy Atavus is acting even more like herself. The next chapter she is very much her typical self. Yes that means trouble._


	8. Chapter 8: Orders Are Meant To Be Broken

**Disclaimer: **See chapter 1.

**Review Responses: **

**_Slayer3_**: Yes she is still good, just reckless. (I am resisting the urge to take your comment and turn it into a plot line all it's own. But no turning her bad would be pushing it to far. I must resist. I must resist.)

Yes a novel, book, original work. What ever you want to call it. My husband insisted if I could right stories for ffnet, that I could write my own stuff too. So the Plot line is beginning to work out, and the characters are created. Now I just have to get the dang thing down on paper.

**_Karone Evertree_**: I'm trying to imagine Legolas wearing a black duster, and cowboy hat, and carrying a rifle. But for some reason it just doesn't work for me. So I have resolved my problem. I am now in the progress of writing three stories. This one of course, my original work I'm trying to get off the ground, and a fanfic for a website totally devoted to my cowboy heroes, which have absolutely no following whatsoever on ffnet. Two stories on the whole darn site. It's disgusting. So if my updates are a little farther apart in days to come don't worry. It's just me obsessing over something else, or someone else I should say, but don't worry I won't forget my Lotr. Anyhow back to your review. Yes what is Atavus up to?

**_Manveri mirkiel_**:

_Chapter 5_: God I gotta love my twin. No apologies necessary. I can understand that life can get crazy sometimes. And when you do review I enjoy reading them so much that I'm usually laughing my butt off.

So on to your review points. Yes our dear little Atavus would make a great patient for any decent shrink don't you think. Guess that's my fault. I made her that way. And yes I am good about taking review comments and turning them into plot lines aren't I?

Oh my I think it's a first. I've actually managed to get a Leggy fan girl mad at Legolas. Now that's something to be proud of. (Pats Evil self on shoulder)

Yes this chapter was difficult. Everyone ended up hurting in the end, and even though it's almost tolerable to be hurt by an enemy, it's completely horrendous to be hurt by a friend.

_Chapter 6_: Yeah right they'll go back to Rivendell. You are dreaming. Yes Legolas was being mean, but you noticed how easily his bitterness faded when he realized how much she needed him. Now that is a true friend.

Thank you for the comment about not disturbing the plot line. I'm trying. I was seriously going to try book verse, but after rereading it decided that it would be impossible to do so without disturbing the work, and I don't feel as bad about changing Peter Jackson's interpretation (which is a far cry from book verse itself) slightly at least. He left me a few little gaps in time to work with. Thank you Mr. Jackson.

I knew you'd ask about the blood thing. I just knew it. Let's see. Do you know the true story behind the legend of Count Dracula? I mean the story of Vlad the Impaler. If you do that will give you a hint. If not just ask I'll explain some scary similarities. And before you ask no I don't drink blood. (Not on a regular basis at least. Mrhaha.)

_Chapter 7_: Yes I am writing a novel. And yes I already planned on sending you, Slayer and probably three other reviewers copies if I ever get published. I do believe you will like it. It has at least one very familiar character in it.

Actually the clucking noise is reserved for my husband usually when I'm exasperated with his behavior.

There is something I have figured out. If you find a close friend, as close as my characters in these stories, no matter what don't let them go. I've done that too much already, and you just can't replace them.

Ah yes it's time to write typical Atavus. Here we go.

**_Larien: _**You reviewed right before I was ready to post the new chapter. So this will be a quick update for you. Yes I like writing scenes like the one between Legolas and Atavus. They pull at your heartstrings. I will fix the grammatical error. I promise. I'm usually a stickler for grammar too, but I missed that one completely. And yes I am writing my own original work, and if you read my response to manveri (which is a book in itself) you'll see that it includes one of our favorite characters. (Hell she's mine. I well as use her.) And I'll make a promise to my faithful reviewers. After it's published I'll send out a few copies of it to those of you who are seriously interested, and if you like it, you can suggest it to your friends. Deal?

**Author's Note: **This chapter is dedicated to one of my favorite characters, which Peter Jackson decided to unfairly kill off in the movie. (Yes I left him dead, but I didn't want to.) And also the numbers of the men and elves killed at Helm's Deep are just numbers I pulled out of the air, and do not include any of the Rohirrim that might have been killed in the final attack. Don't kill me if they sound unrealistic.

**Orders Are Meant To Be Broken**

She waited until everyone had left the armory, and slipped quietly in picking up the items she would need. She had her orders from the King, but she also had her inner sense of duty to answer to. She had always fought beside men, but now someone was telling her to hide in the caves with the women and children. That just would not do. She slipped the light chain mail over her tunic. It was not as sturdy as the heavier mail and fit awkwardly, but she would need the lighter material to be able to move freely. She also selected a helm that would cover her hair and most of her face just in case she ran into one of her friends. They would not be happy to know she was taking such a risk.

As she turned to leave the armory a lone figure was standing near the door. She had seen the arrival of the elves, but had stayed away from them, not wanting to answer any questions. She recognized Haldir, the leader of the marchwarden of the Galadhrim of Lorien. She had never met him, but had heard tell of his remarkable skills in warfare.

"My lady." He greeted her. She removed the helm realizing it was pointless at the moment.

"My Lord." She greeted him back.

"I bring you a present from the Lady Galadhriel." He smiled as a look of shock crossed her face.

"But no one knew I was here." Then it dawned on her. "She saw me in her mirror?"

He nodded. "She said to tell you that it would not be fitting for one such as yourself to dress as one of the men of Rohan. I would have to agree with her." He said holding a package out in his hand. She unfurled the paper exposing a set of elvish armor and clothing matching the uniform of the marchwarden.

The material was light as can be, but sturdier than any chain mail made by men. "I am not worthy of the uniform of the marchwarden." She said trying to hand the package back to him.

He pushed the package back towards her. "The Lady also said to tell you that it matters not what is in the blood. It is only your own actions that determine your worth. And you have been determined very worthy. She insists, and so do I."

"But would you insist if you truly knew what I was?" She asked. She was tired of hiding her origin for fear of being rejected.

"Who says I don't already know?" He asked moving closer pressing the uniform to her chest. "I know what you were born, but thanks to my Lady's mirror I also know what you have become. I would be proud to fight by your side."

"I thank you Haldir." She bowed her head slightly showing the proper respect, and her gratitude at his words.

* * *

She took up a position among the elvish archers on the ground behind the main gate. She was where she could keep an eye on her friends, but still remain unnoticed. She would be there if they needed her, but would not distract them with worry for her. 

She heard Estel's order to fire and did so wishing she was where she could see the enemy. It would not be long though. As the orcs climbed over the walls of the keep she used her bow to pick off as many as possible.

Things seemed to be going well. They were holding back the tide of invaders with minimal casualties. But that was about to change. She heard Estel yell to Legolas to shoot someone she couldn't see on the other side of the wall. But then she watched in horror as an explosion rocked the area sending pieces of wall flying in all directions. She was hit by flying debris knocking her to the ground and dazing her for a moment. When the confusion of her mind dissipated she looked around and noticed Estel fighting orcs near the wall before her. She heard the order to charge the attackers and immediately leapt to her feet with her sword drawn.

Time seemed to slow. She slashed to the left and then the right dispatching the orcs pouring towards her. It seemed like an endless stream, and she wondered if they would ever stop coming. She heard King Théoden's order for Aragorn to retreat and get his men into the Keep. She watched as most of the other elves that were left standing made thier way into the Keep, and was about to follow when she saw three elves pointing towards a lower door in the Keep that led to the caves. It was being set upon by a small band of orcs. She changed direction knowing that if the orcs got through that door the women and children of Rohan would be dead. She and the three elves that she had never seen before made their way to the door and blocked the entrance killing any orc that dared to come close.

They were distracted but a moment when the sun finally rose, but that moment was all it took for an orc to sneak in low and land a sword blow to her side. She crumpled to the ground next to the door holding her side. The orc would have finished her if one of the elves beside her hadn't stepped in and defended her. She took deep breaths willing the pain away knowing she could not stay crumpled on the ground while surrounded by orcs.

But the orcs themselves were distracted seeing King Théoden and several riders barrel out the keeps doors, and then out the front gate destroying every orc that got in their way. "Good for you my King." She whispered. She stood then and continued to slash away at any attacker that might try to slip by her. She hadn't realized when the orcs had stopped coming and she just stood there with her sword hanging limply at her side. She could hear cheering all around her, but to her own ears it was shadowed by the calls of pain from injured men around her.

She dropped the sword as the healer in her took over searching for those that needed her help. She also removed her helm and sent someone into the keep to retrieve her pouch of healing supplies. There were many more dead than alive. But those that were still alive needed her help. She worked the rest of the day, giving orders to anyone that would help her. Most of the women who had been hiding in the caves volunteered their help. She personally checked every body for life, Out of the three hundred men and one hundred elves that had fought inside the keep one hundred and ninety six men had perished and eighty-four elves. That number was staggering. None of the elves that were left alive had life threatening wounds, but there were eight men taken inside the Keep with poisoned wounds, that she would have to see to personally. She would leave the lesser injuries to the healers she had trained.

She was checking the last of the bodies on the top of the wall closest to where it had been breached when she came across a body that she had hoped not to see. She kneeled beside the leader of the marchwarden, and bowed her head. She had not known him personally, but the moment they had spent in the armory, and the words he had said had left an impression on her that she would carry the rest of her life. "If only I had known you longer it would have been easy to call you _mellon-nin_, for even one such as I could see your soul burned brighter than any flame in all of Middle-Earth. You will be missed Haldir." She whispered, as the tears streamed down her face.

She heard the almost silent footsteps behind her. "Atavus?" A voice questioned.

She turned seeing Estel standing behind her. He could see the tears sliding down her face. She stepped the few feet forward wrapping her arms around the man.

He looked down at her appearance. She was muddy and covered in both red and black blood. But he also saw the uniform of the marchwarden. "What have you been doing Atavus?" he said pulling her away slightly so he could look at her face. "Where did you get that uniform?"

"It was a gift from Haldir, and the Lady of Lorien. They said it would not be fitting for me to fight dressed as a man of Rohan." She explained.

"You were fighting." He looked her over checking for injuries, but the black material of her uniform covered the wound in her side, and she had too much work to do to worry about it yet.

"Yes. I'm fine Estel. But Haldir." She turned back to where his body was laying.

"Yes I know. I came to remove his body. I was here when he died." Estel explained.

She just nodded. "Legolas and Gimli. Are they all right?" She asked.

"Yes. They are just fine. Are you sure you are all right?" He asked worried for her.

"Yes. I have work to do though." She said starting to walk back towards the keep.

"Atavus the King wants you to load the wounded into wagons and take them back to Edoras to be treated. We are going with Gandalf to Isengard to confront Saruman. We will meet you back at the Meduseld in couple of days time." He said walking beside her.

"The wounded are stable enough to be moved I believe, and it is less than a days walk to Edoras. That shouldn't be a problem." She answered, and thought to herself that, that would give her a chance to heal before she used her gift.

As they parted she looked to Estel and said. "I'm glad you made it."

"I'm glad we all made it." He said. She knew he was talking about his closest friends.

* * *

_Author's Note: So is Atavus enough like herself yet. I've gotta get in a scene where she is being a smart-ass though. I miss the banter she had with Ugluk. Oh I might have to wait until the next story. Dang it. Anyway there are only a couple of more chapters left to this one (Unless a stray plot bunny hit's me again. I need to learn to duck while around certain reviewers.) Then I promise I will dive right into the sequel._


	9. Chapter 9: Duty and Consequences

**Disclaimer: **See chapter 1.

**Review Responses:**

**_Slayer3_: **I understand. We don't get to see enough of Haldir either. But he is just cool.

**_Karone Evertree: _**Chivalry had its place and time. But during a battle with the odds they had, to heck with it. They needed all the help they could have gotten. Yeah I'm itching to get to the next story so I can have my smart-ass Atavus back. I miss her.

**_Larien:_** Haldir seemed to me to be a character that Peter Jackson could have developed a lot further if he'd tried, but instead he killed him off. So I cheated a little and did some development myself. I don't see him as messed up. He's strong, loyal, and fearless. He needs to stay that way. Man I'm having orc withdrawal. Oh Ugluk polish your sword. I'll need you soon.

**_Lintered:_** Oh I love new reviewers. Now, now, now, you can't read anymore story if you kill the authoress. (Cool my first death threat on this story. Yessssssss.)

**_manveri mirkiel:_** Impaling people, hmm, now that's a form of torture I haven't tried yet. Cool. Oh yeah right I was saying, the explanation about Vlad is long, so I'll just email you on it. And I assure you I don't drink blood on a regular basis, even though I have been tempted.

Oh I love the counting part too, but I didn't want to just retell the Two Towers story here so I left it out. And believe me Legolas might have something to say about her fighting pretty soon. And yes our dear Atavus is back to normal. But just as reckless as always, but that's the way we love her isn't it?

**Author's Note**: Okay don't throw anything at me. I ran into another plot bunny. Warning cliffhanger ahead.

**Duty and Consequences**

Atavus stayed with the carts that carried the wounded back to Edoras. Éowyn walked beside her. "My uncle will not be pleased that you disobeyed his orders."

"I know. Éowyn you feel the same way as I do about women fighting for their people. I respect our King, but I have been a warrior longer than he has been alive. It is in my blood. I cannot change that, just as you cannot change the way you feel. You will have your time also when you must make the same decision that I did." Atavus knew the secret longing to be a warrior that Éowyn held, and she also knew that the woman would not stand back idle while the men rode to war, for very much longer.

"Are you suggesting that I would disobey my uncle?" The woman said with a look of shock on her face.

"Only if it is what is meant to be Éowyn. You will know." She walked ahead a few paces giving the woman room to think. She also wanted time to herself. The wound in her side was affecting her more than she had thought it would. It had been many years since she had been injured while fighting, and she began to wonder at the amount of pain this time. She was still wearing the uniform of the marchwarden. She felt her side probing the wound. It did not feel deep, but was tender to the touch. As she brought her hand away from the wound she could see that her hand was covered in dark red blood.

She was bleeding more than she had thought, and with each step she took the sliced skin was stretching not allowing it to start healing.

It had taken them two days to return instead of the one she had expected. They had, had to take it slow as not to hurt the wounded.

As they entered Meduseld she instructed the healers to sort the wounded by severity of wound into the different rooms that were kept ready for such the possibility of multiple wounded. Then she was left alone in a room where the men who had received poisoned wounds had been taken. There were eight of them and they were arranged on pallets on the floor. She would need help and was elated to see Éowyn enter as she wondered whom to trust with helping her.

"I thought maybe you would need me." The woman explained.

"Yes I do." It had been many years since she had passed out while healing, as she had built up a tolerance of sorts, but she had never tried to heal so many at once. She started with the most serious wound. "After I do the healing you must bandage the wounds. Watch me close though. There is the slight possibility that I will pass out, if that happens the connection between the man and I must not be severed until the process is complete."

Éowyn had seen her use her gift before. At first she had been frightened of the healer, thinking her ability was unnatural, until the day that Atavus had saved her brother's life with the gift. That had forever changed her opinion of Atavus, and now she was most eager to help in any way. She watched as Atavus moved from one wounded man to another. She did not pause in between, and she could see the cloudy look in her eyes. By the time Atavus reached the sixth man she was not sure she would have enough of her own blood left to replace the poison she was removing, but she would still have to try.

This was it. The last wounded man. She was having difficulty moving around the room, and her vision was clouded from the poison inside her. She could barely hear as Éowyn asked if she was all right. She just nodded reaching out to the wounded man. Her hands fumbled as she searched for the wound. Her mind was becoming confused. She needed to finish it and quickly, before she was unable to do so. She felt Éowyn's hand grasp her own and pull it forward to rest on the shoulder wound. She did not remove her hand.

Éowyn watched Atavus working on the last man and was very disturbed at what she saw. Her skin was turning grey. Her eyes were so cloudy they seemed like milk. And her breathing was beginning to come in gasps. She felt Atavus pull her hand from the wound. The healer did not move. She stared to the marble floor, as if she was lost.

"Atavus you need to lie down." She suggested.

"Yes help me please." Atavus asked reaching out feeling for Éowyn's hand. The woman was shocked to see that Atavus could not find it.

"Atavus?" She questioned.

"The poison is clouding my vision. I can't see you." She whispered as the woman grasped her hand. "It will not last. Don't worry. I just need rest. Lots of sleep." Éowyn stood helping Atavus up, and placed her on a pallet in the corner. She had considered taking her to her own room, but wasn't sure she could get her there if she passed out.

She wrapped her in blankets, and pulled her hair back out of her face. "What do you need?"

"Just sleep Éowyn. Thank you. I could not have done that by myself." Atavus said squeezing her hand.

"I will help you any time you need it my friend." The woman said leaving her to sleep.

* * *

It had been a long hard ride from Isengard, but the remaining members of the fellowship were glad to be back. They had decided to ride ahead, bringing the two hobbits with them. King Théoden had started back at a slower pace allowing his men some well-deserved rest. It was the darkest night when they returned, and they all settled down together in the quarters prepared for them.

Éowyn learned later the next day that one of the hobbits had caused a disturbance in the middle of the night, which ended with he and the wizard riding off toward Minas Tirith with all haste. She wasn't sure what it was about but she did not like the looks of it. She had been kept busy most of the night making preparations for the King's return, so it wasn't until almost noon that she finally was able to go check on the wounded men and Atavus.

She could see that Atavus still slept, which wasn't uncommon, after healing. She could also see that most of the men were already up milling around due to the healing abilities of her blood. She allowed them all to leave the healing quarters, but put them on restricted duty. She almost decided not to disturb the sleeping woman, but changed her mind and kneeled beside her. Her skin was still that dull grey color which disturbed her so much. She reached out touching the side of Atavus' face and was shocked to feel immense heat radiating from the skin. "Atavus." She said shaking the woman. "Wake up."

There was no reaction from her. She did notice though that the woman was trembling, and her teeth were chattering. She grabbed another blanket pulling it over her. She did not know what to do for the woman. She was no healer herself. Then she thought of Aragorn. He was a healer. She bounded out of the room running down the hall, not caring that she nearly knocked down several men. As she entered the main hall she saw that Legolas and Gimli were present, but not Aragorn.

"Where's Aragorn?" She asked the two with a distressed note in her voice.

"He's off talking with Merry somewhere. What is wrong Éowyn?" Legolas asked.

"It's Atavus. Something's wrong. I can't get her to waken." She explained.

"Show me." He insisted starting back the way she had came. She led him to the room she had left Atavus in.

He found her lying on a pallet in the corner, and he had never seen her look so sick. "What happened?" He asked pulling her up cradling her to him.

"She healed eight men yesterday. When she finished she said she just needed sleep. But look at her. Something is seriously wrong." Éowyn explained.

"Too much _mellon-nin_." He whispered. "Why must you always go too far?"

He could feel the warmth coming from her, and knew her fever was raging. He could also see she was shivering. The room was chilled, and there was no fireplace present. "I need to take her to her own room. It's too cold here for her. You go find Aragorn." He placed both arms under her lifting her to his chest, making his way out of the room and towards her own.

When he reached the room he placed her on the bed as gently as possible. As he pulled his arms out from under her he could see dark red blood smeared on the left sleeve of his tunic. His eyes widened realizing that she must be injured. He worked frantically looking for the injury. He pulled the marchwarden cape and armor off then pulled the tunic up on her side. He could see the long gash there, and dreaded the sight. The edges of the skin had turned black from the poison running through her body.

"Atavus why do you have to do this? We just got you back. I can't bear to lose you again." He whispered, his voice full of emotion.

He found a basin full of water, and began cleaning the wound. He had just finished the task when Aragorn burst through the door. Aragorn could see the gash on her side, and could not believe he had missed it. "How did this happen Estel?" Legolas asked him.

"She was fighting as one of the marchwarden. It was Haldir's idea." Aragorn answered.

"She knew better to attempt healing while she was injured." Legolas said remembering when Atavus had healed Aragorn while she was suffering from a dislocated shoulder. "Going out and fighting was reckless enough, but doing this was downright insane."

Éowyn had been standing back watching as the two friends treated Atavus. "Reckless. You say she was reckless."

Legolas looked back at her not even realizing she was still in the room. "Yes, but that is normal for her."

"Why is it reckless for her to want to defend those she cares for?" She asked him.

"She should have been in the caves." He answered thinking it was obvious.

"Why, because she's a woman? She's a warrior too master elf. Just the same as you. And considering the fact that she and three other elves held off the orcs that were trying to get into the caves, to kill us precious women, I'm glad she is a warrior. Many of us might not be here today, if not for her." Éowyn was tired of the chivalrous attitude that the men surrounding her were taking. It was time for them to face the fact that they might need the help of the fairer sex to win this war. And she meant to make sure they realized it before all was said and done.

"No because she is essential when it comes to healing. The wounded could not well afford to lose her." He answered. "She has fought by my side many times, but in the case of all out war there are too many depending on having able bodied healers after the battle is over. That is why I say she was reckless."

She was so used to fighting with her brother and uncle on the subject of women in battle that she hadn't thought that the elf would have other reasons for not wanting her in harms way. "I'm sorry. I spoke, before I thought. But in her defense it is her caring heart that motivates her to recklessness."

"It always has been." Aragorn said pouring a fever reducing tea, he had made down her throat. He could see that her swallowing reflexes were still working. That was a good sign.

Her eyes flew open, as she gagged on the tea. "I can still tell when you're talking about me." She whispered. He could see the cloudy look in her eyes. That did worry him.

"That does not surprise me _mellon-nin_." He said placing a soft kiss on her brow.

Legolas sat beside her on the bed as Aragorn finished giving her the tea. He could see that she stared off in the distance not seeking them with her eyes. "Atavus are you all right." He had a nagging feeling that something was really wrong.

"Legolas." She said reaching out and placing a hand on his arm. She used her fingers to feel her way up his arm to his face. She touched his cheek softly feeling the frown on his lips. "I'm relieved that you survived."

Legolas looked to Aragorn with concern on his face. Aragorn looked back understanding the silent message. "Atavus is something wrong with your vision?"

She just nodded a dark look on her face.

"After she finished healing the wounded she couldn't see anything. She said it was the poison, but that it would wear off." Éowyn answered for her.

"Has this ever happened before Atavus?" Aragorn asked.

"No it hasn't." She whispered.

* * *

_Author's Note: Oh boy I did again didn't I? Anyway what do you think of Éowyn standing up to the men? Atavus was hurt she couldn't do it for herself, so I had to find another strong woman to help her with it._


	10. Chapter 10: Saying Farewell

**Disclaimer: **See chapter 1.

**Author Note**: The system did not send out an author alert for the last chapter. I don't know why. Ffnet is changing some things around. So it must be a glitch. But anyway you might want to check and see if you've read nine before you start here. Major tissue warning for this chapter.

**Review Responses**: Well even though no alert was sent out a couple of my faithful readers found the chapter anyway and reviewed, so here goes.

**_Larien:_** Yeah one of my reviewers mentioned that Atavus might have affected Éowyn's attitude towards women in combat and well I liked the idea, so I stole it. Now who was it I stole that from?

Anyhow, yes the poor girl is blind. For now, and maybe for a while, but probably not forever. Yeah well I'm not gonna tell you how long.

**_Karone Evertree: _**You sound suspiciously like a certain elf we all know and love. But thank you, thank you, and thank you.

**Saying Farewell**

"Well Legolas at least this is one way for you to insure that I go back to Rivendell." Atavus said smiling at her friend.

"This is not how I wanted it to be Atavus." He could not see how she could joke in the situation she was in. Her wound was completely healed, and the poison had left her system, but her eyesight had not returned.

"I know Legolas. Please don't worry too much over me. Ada will have some idea of how to reverse this. I have faith in him." She tried to assure her friend.

He almost asked her what if it could not be reversed, but the words caught in his throat. It wasn't right, and it wasn't fair. Elves did not suffer blindness. She was packing a small bag of cloths to take with her back to Rivendell. She was lucky that one of the Lorien elves had volunteered to accompany her there. Otherwise she would have had to stay in Rohan indefinitely. He could see that she was getting around rather well without her sight, but that was to be expected with her other heightened senses.

"We will be leaving for Minas Tirith soon." She could hear that his voice sounded hollow. She knew he was torn between his duty to go with Estel, and his want to see her safely home.

She turned to him, and took his hand in her own. "Legolas I know you feel bad about not being able to go with me, but Estel needs you more. His greatest challenge is at hand, and I don't think he will survive without you."

"I know. I just don't like the idea of you trying to get back to Rivendell the way you are." He explained.

"I will be perfectly fine. Terlon the Lorien elf that will escort me is one of the three who were with me when I was wounded. He defended me until I could gain my feet again. If not for him I would be dead now. I trust him." She did not want him to worry over her. He would need his full concentration for what was ahead of him, and Estel would need him.

As if her thoughts could conjure his very presence Estel entered her room. She could hear his footsteps, even though they were almost as light as elves. "Estel will you tell him to stop worrying over me." She said crossing her arms expecting her adoptive brother to take her part.

"He has every right to worry about you, just as I do." Aragorn informed her smiling at Legolas when he saw the shocked look on her face.

"You men are insufferable." She finally said turning to finish her packing.

She was stopped though as she felt a hand on her shoulder. "_Mellon-nin_." She stopped packing ready to hear more arguments about her intentions to travel to Rivendell. "We will miss you."

The words of argument she had meant to say drifted from her mind. She turned and wrapped her arms around Estel's torso burying her face in his chest. They could hear her muffled reply. "I will miss you too." She stood like that for a few moments, wanting nothing more then for them to be able to take her fears away. Then she drew back wiping the tears from her face. "I feel robbed somehow. Sixty two years without you, and now I have to leave you after just a few days together." Had it only been a few days since they had found her again? It seemed so much longer, but not nearly long enough. "But I promise, whether Ada is able to reverse this or not, I will be in Gondor for your Coronation Ceremony."

"You're getting ahead of yourself some aren't you?" Estel said laughing at her complete confidence in him.

"No, I'm not. It will be Estel, and I for one can't wait to see it." She over pronounced the word 'see' to insure them that she had every intention of seeing it with her own two eyes.

"Terlon is waiting for you." Aragorn reminded her.

She finished packing a few items she might need. "Is that everything?" She asked not sure if she had gotten everything in the pack.

"I don't see anything else." Legolas said taking a look around. But he did notice something. He stepped over to the corner and picked up her weapons, deciding she should take them whether she could use them or not.

She nodded as she felt him place her bow in her hand. "_Hannon le_." She whispered securing her weapons. They each took a position on either side of her like they had the first night they had found her in the dungeons of Edoras, as they made their way to the bottom of the stairs outside of Meduseld. Terlon was waiting there for her, holding her horse.

Éowyn was the first to say her farewell. "I will miss you Atavus. Will you eventually come back?"

"I'm sorry my friend but I'm afraid this chapter of my life is finished. I will no longer be a Healer of Rohan. I am going to simply be Atavus. But perhaps some day we will meet in Gondor." She leaned forward hugging the woman, and whispered for her ears only. "Just remember what I said on the way back from Helm's Deep. You will know the time."

As Éowyn pulled away she nodded, not thinking that the woman could not see her. Then she wiped away the tears that were touching her cheeks. She turned and made her way back into the hall, knowing there was much to prepare for.

Gimli was next. He had grown rather fond of the woman that his two closest companions cared so deeply for, and had also learned something from Aragorn, which raised his opinion of her immensely. "My lady, I wish we had, had more time together. You are one of the most intrigue persons I have ever met."

"Thank you master dwarf." She blushed at the charming words.

"And I promise that when all this mess is over and done with, and I go back home to the Lonely Mountain, that I will mention you to my cousin Garin." He said surprising her.

"Garin is your cousin." The shock in her voice was evident.

"Second cousin actually. But cousin none the less, and I have heard many a tale from him concerning a beautiful red headed elf maid, that he thought of like a daughter. I always thought he was daft for caring for an elf so much, until now." He said looking towards Legolas.

She knew whom his words referred to. She leaned in close and whispered a request. "Watch out for him, please. I can't bare to lose either of them."

"I most certainly will, my lady." He said patting her hand. He too left, wanting to give the three friends their privacy. She had already said her farewells to the King, and his nephew Éomer.

"Well this is it." She said with a brilliant smile on her face.

"Yes it is." Aragorn said stepping forward first. "You already know how I feel." He said taking her hands in his. "Please be cautious. No recklessness this time." He said teasing her only half-heartedly.

"I promise. I will tell Ada that you send him your best, and I will see you in Gondor in a few months." She hugged him again not wanting to leave the protection he offered, but knowing she must.

She pulled back and he moved a slight distance away so Legolas could say his goodbyes also.

Legolas stepped forward taking her hands as Aragorn had. "You still remind me of Estë. Healing all the hurts of those you care for."

She was surprised to hear his words. It had been many years since she had heard that name, though it had been in her mind almost every day. "It is daytime now Legolas. Estë must rest and so must I."

He knew she referred to much more than the time of day. It was time for the healer to be healed. "You will find the rest you need in Rivendell, and hopefully your body and soul will find the healing they need also."

"That is what I depend on." She answered. She reached up and touched his face, wanting to see if there was a smile there for her. He obliged by giving her one, which in turn made her smile. "Remember your smile is the light that brought me from the shadows in the first place. I will not remain there any longer than I must."

He pulled her to him in an uncommon display of affections. "Remember hope." His voice was choked with emotion.

"I always will." She said pulling away from him, and making her way to where her horse was waiting.

Terlon was waiting for her, and he helped her mount the steed. She turned back to them almost as if she could see them, then faced forward as the other elf mounted and led her horse away.

* * *

_Authors Note: Well my friends there is one more chapter after this one, and then it is on to my next story, which is the fourth installment in the Blood series. Yes I promise that I will start on it immediately._


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